Part 3: How to Stop Stressing Over Money! Simple Signs You're in a Good Place (Paying Yourself)

I used to tell myself I'd pay myself "when the business could afford it." You know what that really meant? Never. There was always something else that needed the money first - new contractors, marketing, that unexpected expense, or just keeping extra cash in the account "just in case." If you want to stop stressing over money, paying yourself consistently is the first step.

Here's what I wish someone had told me earlier - if you're not paying yourself consistently, you don't actually know if your business is profitable. You're just subsidizing it with your own unpaid labor. Learning to stop stressing over money starts with understanding your true business cash flow.

When you finally start paying yourself regularly - not sporadically when you have a good month, but consistently every month - that's when you know your business is actually working. Not just surviving but working for you instead of the other way around.

The Real Reason We Don't Pay Ourselves

Most business owners I work with have the same story. They started their business to have more control over their income but ended up being the last person to get paid. They'll cover payroll, rent, supplies, taxes - everything - before taking a dime for themselves. If you want to stop stressing over money, you need to prioritize paying yourself like any other essential expense.

And they justify it. "I'm building something," "It's an investment," "I can always catch up later."

But here's the thing - if your business can't afford to pay you a reasonable salary, it's not a business. It's an expensive hobby that's slowly draining your personal finances.

I had a client who hadn't taken a consistent paycheck in two years. Two years. She was making good money, had steady clients, but every month she'd find a reason why this month "wasn't the right time" to pay herself. When we finally calculated how much she was owed, it was over $80,000. Her business had been borrowing from her life for two years, and she didn't even realize it.

What Paying Yourself Actually Tells You

When you pay yourself first - before the extra marketing spend, before the "nice to have" expenses, before building up a cash cushion that's really just fear in disguise - you're forcing your business to prove it can sustain both itself and you.

1. It shows your pricing is right. If you can't afford to pay yourself and cover business expenses, your prices are too low. Period. No exceptions, no "but my industry is different." You either raise your prices or figure out how to serve the same clients more efficiently.

2. It proves your business model works. A business that requires the owner to work for free isn't a business model - it's a charity case. When you can pay yourself consistently, you know you've built something sustainable.

3. It gives you real numbers to work with. You can't make smart financial decisions when you don't know your true costs. Your salary is a cost. Factor it in, and suddenly you have clarity on what your business actually makes.

Signs You're in a Good Place

• You have a set salary, and you stick to it. Not "I'll take whatever's left." Not "I'll figure it out next month." You've decided on a number that covers your personal needs, and you pay it to yourself like any other essential business expense.

• You don't feel guilty about taking it. You've stopped having internal debates about whether you "deserve" to be paid for running your own business. You know your salary is earned, not a luxury.

• Your business runs smoothly even after you pay yourself. Bills get paid, operations continue, and you're not scrambling at the end of the month. That's the sign your business has real profitability, not just good cash flow timing.

• You can plan your personal finances. When your income is consistent, you can make real decisions about your life. Buying a house. Planning a vacation. Making investments. You're not constantly wondering what next month will look like financially.
  

That same client I mentioned. Once we implemented a consistent monthly salary for her, everything changed. She could finally see which months were genuinely good and which ones just looked good because she wasn't accounting for her own value. She raised her prices by 30% within six months because she finally understood her real costs.

How to Start Paying Yourself

I'm not saying you need to go from zero to a six-figure salary overnight. But you need to start somewhere, and that somewhere should be now.

1. Figure out your minimum. What do you actually need to live on? Not your dream salary, your baseline. Rent, food, insurance, basic personal expenses. That's your starting point.

2. Make it non-negotiable. Treat your salary like rent. You wouldn't skip paying rent because you had a slow month, right? Same principle.

3. Start small if you have to. Even $1,000 a month is better than the random, guilt-driven amounts you're probably taking now. Build the habit of paying yourself consistently, then increase the amount as your business grows.

4. Track the impact. Watch what happens to your decision-making when you're forced to run your business after paying yourself. You'll get smarter about expenses real fast.

   
   

The goal isn't just to get paid. The goal is to build a business that works for you, not one that survives off your unpaid labor. When you can pay yourself consistently without stress, you're not just in a good place financially - you've built something real.

And if you're already doing this? If you're paying yourself regularly without guilt and your business is still thriving? You're further ahead than you think. Most business owners never figure this out.

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